Finding peace with Borderline Personality Disorder

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life filled with personal chaos?
Chaotic minds and behaviours,
slowly destroying everything around us.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life full of anger and hate?
Hate and anger that breaks relationships, friendships,
and the toxic self-hate we hold towards ourselves.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life full of loneliness?
Even with an abundance of people surrounding us,
the internal emptiness still remains.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life with such severe emotional mood swings?
One minute elated and excited, the next feeling like your world is crashing down.
And the worst part – never really knowing why.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life filled with self-doubt?
Questioning everything you say and do,
getting sucked into just wanting to be “normal”.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life where we don’t even know who we are?
What part is me? What part is my condition?
The constant questioning of identities.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life where the fear of abandonment arises daily?
Trying your hardest to be the best person you can to those you love,
but always fearing you’ll be left anyway.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life of impulsive, self-destructive behaviours?
Struggling to keep an element of control,
yet knowing this can tip at any point.

How do we expect to find peace,
in a life full of stereotypes and stigmas?
Scared who to tell, yet wanting people to know and understand,
fearing what they may think of you for things you can’t control.

How do we expect to find peace,
when we feel so broken and full of struggles?
Wishing someone could put us back together,
bit by bit, as fast as we fell apart.

How do we expect to find peace,
when the meaning of it contradicts everything about us?
‘Freedom from disturbance; tranquillity’
A definition so opposite.

We may never technically find peace,
But we can find our own version.
One that accepts everything about ourselves.
One that we don’t have to spend our lives searching for.

Focus on finding your own peace, we all deserve it.